Wikipedia:Peer review/Water/archive1

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Water[edit]

This article contains a number of shaky explanations, which might not even be correct, particulary in Water#The ideal properties for life. Large amounts of the article may be improved by better writing, and overall it doesn't seem to flow as well as it should. --[[User:Eequor|η♀υωρ]] 03:35, 23 Sep 2004 (UTC)

  • It doesn't flow as well as it could, eh? That's a bit of a worry about an article about water... - Ta bu shi da yu 03:37, 23 Sep 2004 (UTC)
  • Much better, but still needs improvement:
    • We still need a references section for where you are getting your information from. Also, there is unattributed information in this article that needs to be clarified.
      • "Experts predict more trouble ahead because of the world's growing population, increasing contamination through pollution and global warming." Which experts?
      • "40% of the world's inhabitants currently have insufficient fresh water for minimal hygiene. More than 2.2 million people died in 2000 from diseases related to the consumption of contaminated water or drought." Where are you getting this information from?
    • This article still has too many short sentences that should probably made into longer paragraphs. On this article I'm not that fussed about this point, but if it could be resolved it would be great.
    • No information about large bodies of water like lakes, oceans, etc. Just a brief overview with a picture of something like waves would be fine.
    • What about things that live in water? Surely that's important!
    • No mention of the recreational use of water. Again this is important.
    • Suggestion: what about the dangers of water? Again an important aspect of this substance.
    • What about things like water on other planets? Again, an important aspect of our understanding of water.
Ta bu shi da yu 04:21, 23 Sep 2004 (UTC)
I agree with your comments, and I have put them on the to-do list of water. Pcarbonn 11:48, 27 Sep 2004 (UTC)

(Duplicate listing, moving up) This article is a potential candidate for Featured Article, and I'm sure you'll learn a few things while reading it. Please have a final check before we submit it to FAC. Pcarbonn 20:04, 16 Sep 2004 (UTC)

  • I'm confused with the diagram. What does it mean? Could you add more information onto the actual image itself? Could we also fix up the 1 sentence paragraphs? Some of the paragraphs could be fleshed out, say for instance "The Mpemba effect is the surprising phenomenon whereby hot water can, under certain conditions, freeze faster than cold, even though it must pass the lower temperature on the way to freezing." - give a bit more info (not the entire article it references, just some more info to make it more complete). Also, the history seems tacked on as an afterthought. I mean, there's water->History->Mythology and water->Water in practice->Water in religion... get my drift? Otherwise, this is a really well researched, well-written article! I would be happy to support it if you can sort out these things (especially a structural organisation). - Ta bu shi da yu 15:49, 17 Sep 2004 (UTC)